"That they (the older women) admonish the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed." Titus 2:4-5

Monday, December 6, 2010

Mom Monday: Why I Don't Tell My Daughter Santa is Coming

Photo by jdanvers

My husband and I don't really follow many of the "traditional" American Christmas celebrations. Some of our reasons are "religious" and some are not. We don't do a lot of decorating simply because we don't feel like it. We don't do a lot of gift buying and giving (we mostly make them) because we don't have a lot of money.

One of the most controversial (apparently) is that we don't tell our kids that on Christmas Eve Santa is coming down an imaginary chimney and leaving a bunch of loot for them that the elves at his workshop in the North Pole made for them.

Believe me, I'm not condemning anyone who feels at peace before God to tell their kids about Santa. I feel that I cannot because of personal convictions. I've always tried to be as truthful with my children as possible. I want them to understand for an early age that honesty is very important and that they can expect honesty from me as well. I want them to trust me and see an example of honesty in my life. I don't always succeed perfectly in this, but it is my goal.

I've felt for a long time that having my children believe in Santa would be dishonest. Whenever we come across Santa, I try to make it clear to my 3 year old that he is just "pretend." I'm not going to try sheltering my children from Santa altogether or act like Santa is evil, because I don't think it is. I feel that it is a harmless societal tradition that actually started out because of a great man with a giving spirit. I do plan to teach my daughter about Saint Nicolas as a part of history when she's old enough to understand.

I don't want my children to be crushed and heart broken when they finally realize that Santa is not real. I think children are so crushed because their parents (who they trust completely) told them Santa was real. I just don't feel comfortable leading my children into that kind of falsehood.

Don't think that if you tell your children about Santa that I think you're a horrible parent. I just want to encourage those of you who are in the same boat as me. I also want to encourage those of you who do tell your kids about Santa to have a little understanding towards those parents who don't. My husband and I are constantly dealing with questions and accusations that we are depriving our children of an important part of childhood.

When it comes to traditions and things like this where there is no clear scripture on what to do, please, give each other some grace and accept the personal convictions of others without attacking them. Fighting amongst ourselves is definitely not the way to love each other with brotherly love.

I hope you have a wonderfully blessed Christmas season whether you tell your children about Santa or not! Just out of curiosity, do/did you tell your kids about Santa? Why or why not and have you had to defend yourself in your decision?


Jennifer on December 6, 2010 at 12:50 PM said...

I never told my kids anything either way about Santa. If they asked about him, I told them he was a fun, imaginary person to help celebrate Christmas but the real reason for Christmas is Jesus' birth. We just never make a big deal out of it. If I'm spending money on all those presents, they are going to know who to thank! :-)

Ginger Perry on December 7, 2010 at 8:52 AM said...

I meant to reply yesterday, but didn't get around to it. Just yesterday, my husband and I were called out for not believing in Santa and not wanting to teach our "future" kids about him. We believe that Santa is a false god, sent to steal the glory from Jesus and God. He is a lie and if you tell your kids a lie, then how can you expect them to be honest with you. You don't teach your kids to "do as you say, not as you do". You should always teach your kids to "do as you say and do"! Live by example!

I am not saying that if you told your kids about Santa you are condemned for life or anything like that. I am just saying that in todays world we have to constantly check who and what we are letting into our lives and how much they are a part of our lives.

Jesus is our Savior and was born in all His glory on "Christmas Day"! WE should never take away from the glory that He deserves!

One with many names on December 10, 2010 at 9:56 AM said...

Very interesting :) Thanks for sharing your opinion and how you handle the explanations to the kids. My girls are 10 and 13, we believe in the Spirit of Santa or Spirit of Christmas if you like :)


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