"That they (the older women) admonish the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed." Titus 2:4-5

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Wednesday Wifehood

Well, there are 15 minutes left of Wednesday, so we can still do it!

A lesson that I've learned before and am being reminded of is my MOUTH. Boy, was James ever right in saying that the tongue can be a dangerous thing. It seems to be the hardest part of our bodies to control, despite our intentions. My mind and heart want only to speak words that will edify and uplift my husband and glorify God. Yet some of the things I end up saying shock me in reflection!

My particular reflection will be about our words towards our husbands (Wednesday Wifehood). I once read the book "For Women Only" by Shaunti Feldhahn (I definitely recommend it!) and she said something interesting I'd never heard before. She said that we should make more of an effort to praise our husbands, not just when he's not around, but also when he is around! At first I thought this exhortation was kinda silly. But the more I reflect and pay attention to what I'm saying, I've realized that I am much more ready to praise him when he's not around. I'm not sure why this is exactly.

The goal isn't to inflat his ego. Our society and nature tend to tear people down, rather than to build them up (more about this in general in a later post). Mrs. Feldhahn mentioned that often times our husbands have a negative view of themselves, not the other way around. Regardless of where your husband actually is esteem-wise, where are you with your words towards him? Do you spend most of your time criticizing or correcting? We so easily take the positive things for granted and think "why should I praise him for something he should be doing anyway?" In the bible, in the book of Revelation, in Chapters 2 and 3, Jesus starts off praising each church that has any good qualities, before He rebukes them. This is a principle we should strive to live by. True praise (not false) should always come first, rebuke second. It makes the conversation smoother, strengthens the relationship and strengthens you as a person to remember to look for the good in people. It is there.

My encouragement to you is to take notice of your words and attitudes and if a change is needed, may God give you the strength and grace to do it! I know I need work!


Ryan and Anna on September 22, 2008 at 6:46 PM said...

Would the author of this book encourage men to praise their wives in the same way?

Christian Frugal Mama on September 22, 2008 at 11:05 PM said...

Hi! This book was written specifically to women about men (For Women Only) and she and her husband wrote a similar book called For Men Only coming from the same type of mindset as their first book- things we either just don't know or tend to forget about the opposite sex. I believe throughout the book she mentions that it isn't about men ignoring their wives and expecting all the effort from them, it's just that book had a main focus- the male nature. I believe as Christians in general (as I mentioned, I'll write about that later) we need to learn to find the good in everyone FIRST before we look at the bad. It's so easy to tear down and so difficult to build up. Thank you for leavinga comment! I LOVE feedback! :)


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